5 Tips For A Healthy Separation
In any separation, frame of mind matters more than anything. It is the key to dealing with the many emotions that will ebb and flow throughout the process. It is the key to maintaining healthy relationships with all those who are impacted by your decision to separate. It is the key to empowering yourself (and others) to see your separation as a positive life change, one that is full of hope and aspiration, not heartache and stress.
For those reasons and more, many couples seek to reach a healthy separation. One that allows them to navigate this part of their lives with a firm view of just what can be achieved if they do so with mutual respect.
If you have both decided that it’s time to end your marriage, how do you create a healthy separation? Here are a few key tips:
1. Be Courteous To Your Partner
Just because you’re separating doesn’t automatically mean you have to stop being courteous to your partner. After all, the two of you are going to have to work through the process together and things will be much easier if you are amicable towards one another.
Return your partner’s calls, answer their emails and text messages in what you feel is an acceptable manner and timeframe, and do what you say you’re going to do with the proper conduct. Don’t bad mouth your partner online or offline and don’t view them as an enemy in all this.
While all these steps might sound simple, when you’re going through the divorce process, they can sometimes get forgotten.
2. Carry On As You Have Been (At Least For A While)
There’s often a temptation when divorce is mentioned to make swift, significant changes in haste. But that doesn’t have to (and shouldn’t) be the case.
If you and your partner have had long standing financial arrangements, whereby you pay certain things and they pay others, keep them as they are for at least the time being. You will inevitably reach an agreement on how expenses will be handled going forward, so wait until this time to make changes.
The additional upheaval of major changes to financial arrangements, childcare and lifestyle choices can mar what can be a straightforward process.
3. Always Consider Amicable Divorce Options
Many couples reach the point where they both agree that divorce is the best option for their relationship. In such situations, following an amicable divorce path can make the process not only simpler, but much less taxing.
It’s also a good idea to familiarise yourself with the divorce process.
A little research, reading and speaking with friends who have gone through something similar can go a long way to helping your understanding of a process that always reduces conflict and stress, and invariably reduces costs and time.
You can do this as a couple or individually. What’s important is that you do it to give yourself a better idea of what to expect.
4. Take Advantage Of The Support That’s Out There
Fortunately, there is a lot of support out there for people who are considering or going through a divorce. Charities like Family Lives, Gingerbread and Relate can all provide helpful information on the divorce process and what to expect.
Then there are the many other available support networks, such as your doctor and other professional support services. Both can be helpful, but the latter especially, acting as a friendly ear, can really help you navigate the process calmly and clearly.
If you have more questions about this topic or any other legal issues arising on divorce or separation, please do get in touch as we are always happy to help. You can call us on 0203 488 4475 or email contact@thedivorcesurgery.co.
Author Name: Editor
Published content by The Divorce Surgery Editorial Team.
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