How To Deal With A Stressful Divorce
Divorce can trigger a range of emotions, especially if the situation has taken you somewhat by surprise. But by keeping yourself physically and emotionally fit, managing your expectations and emotions, and still finding time to laugh, you can come through the experience in the best possible shape.
Here are our top tips for dealing with a stressful divorce:
1. Be realistic with your expectations
First and foremost, when separating it’s important to be realistic and manage your own expectations.
If you are the party that instigated the proceedings, chances are you’ve already started coming to terms with what’s happening. But if the whole experience has caught you on the back foot, it’s important to remain as level-headed as possible.
Divorce doesn’t usually occur out of the blue, so it’s likely that you and your partner have been having discussions along these lines for a while, or at least one of you has feelings of wanting to make such a life change. If it’s come to the filing of formal proceedings, remain realistic and try to accept that divorce is all but inevitable.
While it might seem difficult, once you accept that you are getting divorced, you can begin to focus on the upcoming stages of the process and ensure you are in the best possible position to move forward.
2. Remain physically active
When faced with divorce, some people can shy away from their daily routines and, for many, that means neglecting their physical health. But staying physically active is one of the best things you can do to prepare yourself for the unfolding experience.
Physical activity helps stabilise your emotions and can act as a wonderfully constructive vent for anger. In fact, according to Harvard Health, physical activity in the form of exercise can help reduce stress and help you relax.
3. Safeguard your mental health too
In addition to exercise, you also need to safeguard your mental health as much as you can.
You’re likely to be feeling emotionally overwhelmed right now, and that’s not usually helpful in preparing yourself for the next stages of your divorce proceedings. That’s why you need to proactively protect your mental health and carry out activities that help nourish your emotions and wellbeing.
Relevant support groups in your local area, friends and family, creative expression and meditation can all help to keep your mental health in as good a shape as possible.
4. Let yourself grieve
Feeling a range of different emotions when going through a divorce is natural. If you didn’t, something would be up.
Now, an important step in this whole process is allowing yourself to grieve. Even if you are the party who instigated the divorce, chances are you’ll have lots of fond memories of happier times and separating isn’t exactly a happy event.
So, allow yourself to grieve and reflect on the better times of your marriage. Doing so will help you come to terms with the situation. The quicker you do this, the quicker you can focus on moving on.
5. But remember to laugh
Don’t forget to laugh and enjoy yourself too. While the situation might not seem like it warrants frivolity, laughter really is an effective medicine. Indeed, mirthful laughter — that’s laughing at stuff you genuinely find funny — has been proven to help boost both mindfulness and our bodies.
When you laugh, your heart beats stronger and that means more oxygen is delivered to your cells. As a result, they function more optimally, standing you in better stead in the process. In fact, laughter can also help boost your immune system by increasing the production of anti-infection antibodies and T-cells in the blood that help protect you from infections.
6. Try to move on as soon as you can
Finally, if you and your partner have been discussing divorce for a while and it now looks like an inevitability, try not to focus on what’s happened and instead look to the future.
While there will be reasons why your marriage has broken down, don’t dwell on them too much as you move forward. Try to forgive things that have happened and don’t allow any negativity to remain with you as you head into the future.
By spending time in the early stages identifying and considering the reasons behind the divorce, you can establish what (if anything) you need to change and then move on in the most beneficial fashion.
Divorce is a stressful event, there’s no denying that, but by following these tips, you can come through it in the best possible shape.
If you have more questions about this topic or any other legal issues arising on divorce or separation, please do get in touch as we are always happy to help. You can call us on 0203 488 4475 or email contact@thedivorcesurgery.co.
Author Name: Editor
Published content by The Divorce Surgery Editorial Team.
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